Friday, March 18 2016 13:05 EET
If the Second World War would have been a fight in the pub
War, Syria, comnflict, USA, Russia, IS, DAESH, death, blood, terrorism, Iran, Iraq,North Korea, south, Hybrid, EU, Europe, Poland, Britain, Germany, world, USSR, Russia, Japan, nuclear, UK

Germany, Italy and Japan are sitting in the pub. Germany suddenly stands up and begins to warm up and crack the joints.

Germany: What is behind the door "Staff only"? I'll check it out.

UK: Come on. I don't mind.

Austria, looking at it, transfers all its beer to Germany and leaves the pub.

Germany, having satisfied its curiosity, says: “Czechoslovakia, I see that you have a tasty beer. Can I take a sip? “

Czechoslovakia: Uh…

UK: Sure. Czechoslovakia doesn't mind.

Germany makes two big mouthfuls, contentedly snorts and drinks a glass in one gulp.

Czechoslovakia is offended and walks away from the pub.

While no one sees, Poland finishes what was left in the bottom of Czechoslovakia's glass.

Germany: Hey, Poland, and what are you looking at?!

Britain and France: Germany, do not be impudent.

In an instant, Germany pushes Poland on its chest and hits it in the face.

France and UK: Poland, hold on. We will cow Germany! But we will finish our beers at first.

The USSR gets up from the table: "What are you doing?" And kicks Poland in the butt.

Germany turns around and beats France. After that, France falls down, and the United Kingdom has time to get behind the bar.

Germany and UK are starting to throw tankards at each other.

UK gets out of the bar and Italy tries to chase it, but the UK successfully defeats it.

Germany, continuing to throw tankards, bites England's leg.

Realizing that all opponents are defeated, Germany beats the Soviet Union in the face with its knee while the USSR looks aside to tie shoelaces.

USSR falls on the table, knocking over a bunch of beer glasses and a basket of cakes.

At the last moment, USSR dodges and kicks Germany with an unbelievable strength.

UK peeps up from behind the bar and throws a bag of chips at USSR.

USA is fascinated, looking at this turmoil. Germany fiercely fighting with USSR and getting tankards from United Kingdom, calls Japan for help. However, Japan, suddenly knocks out a bar stool from under the backside of the USA. United States is probably frightened and surprised by being unexpectedly hit.

USA begins to pummel Japan. Germany, hoping that Japan will help with defeating USSR, shows the middle finger to the United States. Anyway, Japan is very busy and cannot help Germany. USA sees Germany’s middle finger and starts to grin questionably.

Broken noses, a lot of bumps and bruises on the faces of Germany and the USSR suggest that these participants of the scrimmage exhausted each other.

USA hits a semi-conscious Japan, making it fly several meters away, and uttering a wild cry, the United States rushes to beat Germany, also grabbing UK and France. Germany is getting a lot of hits and strikes from all enemies.

Germany is putting blocks to protect itself from Soviet Union’s hits and trying to kick USA, but it has become too weak.

Another strong hit from the USSR, and it is all over.

USA returns to the corner where Japan is lying. Noticing that the USSR heads in the same direction, the USA gets big shiny pistol and shoots twice in the Japan’s stomach.

USSR and USA, the only ones remaining on its feet, take away the lifeless bodies in different corners of the pub. After that, they sit at different tables and begin looking unkindly at each other.

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